Texty: Weird Al Yankovic. Dog Eat Dog.

Found a job in a great big office
And I really love this place
I got my.... my very own scotch tape dispenser
And I've got a private parking space... ha!
And I've got a coffee mug with my name right on it
In big bold letters so everyone knows it's mine
Don't even touch it, Cause it doesn't belong to you
I'm watchin you, so don't get funny.

I'm climbing up, up the corporate ladder
Watch out! It's dog eat dog
Nose against the grindstone, It feels alright
Watch Out! It's dog eat dog.
Here we go

I love to watch my boss get angry
So I can count the veins on his neck. Ha!
Everyday is like a picnic
Every Friday, get a check

Well, do I smell Jelly donuts? This is my lucky day!
I'll have some coffee with a carcinogenic sweetner
Hold on a minute, just one more jelly donut
They'll never miss it. No, they'll never miss it!

I'm climbing up, up the corporate ladder
Watch Out! Well, It's dog eat dog.
Nose against the grindstone, It feels alright.
Watch out! Hey! Well, It's dog eat dog.

Sometimes I can't believe this is all happening
Sometimes I can't believe I'm sitting here
Sometimes I tell myself, "This is not my beautiful stapler!"
Sometimes I tell myself, "This is not my beautiful chair!"

I can bend paper clips into the shapes of small animals
Maybe I can get on Letterman
I think I made a big mistake
Where's my liquid paper, where's my liquid paper?

I'm climbing way up, way up the corporate ladder
Watch out! Well, It's dog eat dog.
Nose against the grindstone, It feels alright
Better be careful now, It's dog eat dog
Watch out mama! it's dog eat dog.
Nose against the grindstone, it feels real good.
Hey, dog eat dog